So I thought about it and decided I may have been hasty in my assessment of having rats. I looked up the size differences between mice and rats and viewed pics of house mice and it seems more like I have house mice. This is still bad but I feel slightly better because I figure (at least psychologically anyway) mice are somewhat less disastrous to have. They are still going to have to go though.
Life is testing me right now because after months of letting the housecleaning get put on the back burner it’s caught up to me. We have rats (roof rats) and I am really p*ssed off because I am the one doing all the cleaning now. My dad is not tidy and rarely cleans up after himself. Maybe I should cut him some slack but it feels like he doesn’t care about the clutter and dirt and he leaves it for me. In fact if it were not for the rats I likely would not have been motivated to clean up and declutter. So in that respect I am grateful for the rodents.
I’ve been trying to trap them humanely (catch and release) but they have evaded capture
thus far. All I hope for now is to eliminate the food sources and clutter so they will find somewhere else to live. Cleaning up rat poop is not fun and makes me feel worse about how slack I’ve been in keeping house these past months (prior to when I spotted one late in May). It’s like this is my punishment for being depressed and not having the motivation for keeping a clean, tidy home. Now I have no choice but to clean and declutter if I want the rats to go. Technically I have only ever seen two but I am sure there are likely more. Why do they have to be so cute? It would be easier to hate them but even now I am only angry over their unsanitary practices (i.e. pooping in places that are not the toilet, or leaving food they found before I smartened up and put the food in sealed glass containers). Honestly, I am really grossed out by their poop and have trouble falling asleep because any noise I hear makes me think of the rats. It’s wearing me down.
There’s just something about having a rat problem that makes me feel horribly dirty. I wish they would just leave and not return. They are making a lot of cleaning work for me and I do not like it! The grass, trees and rose bushes have to be trimmed too since they likely hide in such spots. Gosh, I feel like there is an awful lot to do so they will hopefully leave. Even if I was alright with killing them (I’m not) it would still be necessary to do the cleaning and decluttering so they don’t come back. As it is though I don’t want to kill them because they are dirty and messy but not any worse than humans. Plus they are cute and it’s awfully hard to murder a small furry creature that simply wants to live somewhere and have something to eat. I just hope they don’t damage anything important like pipes or electrical wiring.
We’ve all hit tough times at some point in our lives, but hopefully everyone reading this also has some amazing memories as well.
While life is full of ups and downs and what we could label as “positive” or “negative” experiences, how we perceive those experiences and what we do with what we learn from those experiences, is how we ultimately become Spiritual Alchemists over our own lives.
To me, if you want to forgive anyone the easiest way there is by understanding them. But what if you didn’t really know them yet their existence had an effect on you. In my case I am trying to understand a grandparent who committed incest with his daughter (my mom) over the span of her childhood. I would really like to understand what caused his behaviour so I can drop my anger towards him. He’s been dead a long time but his actions influenced my upbringing since my mother sexually abused me too (primarily covert abuse). I have released 99% of the anger towards my mom but I have not released any toward the grandfather.
How does one go about understanding someone you never knew? At this rate I am not going to be able to forgive him at all. My heart is not that generous.
If you haven’t read my previous posts this might not make much sense to you but I had computer trouble awhile back and posted about it on here. After putting Windows 7 on my old laptop running Vista I found I couldn’t get my Windows Updates. I pretty much thought my instillation job had gone wrong or something since I had never installed an operating system on a computer before. The Windows 7 I obtained was an OEM (original equipment manufacturer) copy because that’s what is easiest to purchase these days. It’s very difficult to find a retail copy of Windows 7 unless you go on eBay or Amazon but then you don’t always know how authentic the copy you’re getting is. So I got a genuine OEM copy and put it on my laptop that was running Vista.
Long story short, I managed to finally get my updates! Not sure how or what I did but I don’t care. The point is I got them. They took 2 days to install because I had 230+ updates to install. Fortunately I have another computer so used that whilst waiting on my backlog of updates. For awhile I thought the updates were not working because no progress bar was being displayed, just an annoying continuous updating message. So I left my computer alone for a day and a half then realised it had been installing 162 updates! When I saw that I was so shocked I barely registered the relief passing through me. I’d been thinking nothing was happening then I saw how many updates installed and it was just fantastic.
So I eagerly updated the remaining 70+ updates after the 162. My computer kept having to restart for the updates to take effect but I didn’t care. I am just so grateful the updates finally arrived. If I didn’t want Windows 10 for free it would not have mattered if I got my updates or not but I wanted my FREE operating system after paying for Windows 7, LOL! For anyone unaware of the offer if you have Windows 7, 8 or 8.1 you can upgrade to 10 for FREE. You get the same version as whatever your OS is. Mine was Home Premium so I got Windows 10 Home Premium. If you had Ultimate or Business or whatever you’d get that version for free. You do have to meet certain technical requirements but they aren’t that difficult to meet provided your computer is decent (yes, I know decent is open to interpretation) and you get Windows Updates.