Reflections on Life Thus Far

My life. My story: Exploring mental health, spirituality, meditation & random thoughts I have

Holy S*it, It Snowed!

31 Comments

Well we got our snow that was forecast and then some πŸ˜› Right now there’s about 10-15

Snowed trees on mount Brocken, Harz, Germany
Snowed trees on mount Brocken, Harz, Germany (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

cm down on the ground and we are due for some more overnight and tomorrow! Spring, hurry up and arrive!!!

As you can tell I am NOT a ‘good’ Canadian πŸ˜‰ I get upset over snow and cold temperatures despite having lived in this country my whole life. The optimist in my head is shouting over the whiny voice that it’s so pretty outside. Pretty! Oy. It does look very picturesque but it makes for lousy walking and driving conditions. My portfolio development workshop will likely be cancelled tomorrow. Our first session and already we’re using our ‘storm day’ provision. This doesn’t bode well. I can only hope the following weeks are more agreeable.

What do you do when there’s lots of snow? Provided you live somewhere where it actually

English: Child making a (North Dallas, Texas).
English: Child making a (North Dallas, Texas). (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

snows of course. Do you sulk as I do or find ways to embrace the natural beauty of the season? I feel so ashamed of myself. When I was a child the snow made me happy because I got to slide and make snowmen, etc so it was fun. Now I don’t play in the snow and just curse under my breath when there’s a snow flurry! lol

I’m not really into winter sports so there’s not a lot for me to do during the season. My feet always end up cold and so does the rest of me. If I dress warm enough not to be cold I’m uncomfortable! Very few adults wear the appropriate clothes for winter I’ve noticed. When skiing or skating though it is a bit better. Still, my point is I am physically uncoordinated and challenged when it comes to participating in sports. It brings up anxieties in me about looking foolish or silly. In many ways I’ve overcome my cognitive distortions but due to not having opportunities to practice, I remain rigid when considering winter activities.

Maybe it’s also because as a child, when my family would go out somewhere to ski cross

English: Canadian winter sports, snowshoeing a...
English: Canadian winter sports, snowshoeing and skiing. FranΓ§ais : Sports d’hiver canadiens, la raquette et le ski. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

country or skate, I’d end up cold. My mom didn’t think to advise me to dress warmer or buy me wool socks. So I’d have my cotton socks on in the ski boots and end up with frozen feet. My mom would want to finish her skiing though so I’d have to follow behind her with my freezing feet and crying because I wanted to go sit in the car. Basically I was always made to stay past the point of comfort and my mom didn’t have much concern for my feelings. It always felt painful and I hated going with her to do any type of activities. She’d be comfortable and had no problem ignoring my sister and I if we were not so comfortable.

Now I have these negative memories from my childhood around winter activities and can’t enjoy the season. All I associate it with is emotional pain stemming from what was originally physical pain and emotional neglect from my mother. Until now when I was writing this post the memories of my discomfort from winter sports had eluded my conscious memory. It’s back in my conscious awareness now so I guess I am glad I ‘found out’ what the reason is for my distinct lack of enthusiasm for all things winter.

When you have a Narcissist for a parent (mother) it can complicate things that ought to be

sweater - clothes for winter
sweater – clothes for winter (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

simple. Lots of people enjoy winter and get to have fun but I had a mother who ignored me when I told her my feet were freezing. When I say ‘freezing’ that is literal because they often got close to hypothermia stage. My winter clothes weren’t exactly sufficient either. Mom took care of her own needs first and if she remembered my sister and I we’d be looked after. But we were an after thought.

I think in many ways it was ‘benign neglect’ because my mom had little knowledge of what constituted appropriate winter dress. She’d stay warm because she wore several layers of clothes but I didn’t know enough to do anything similar and was not advised either. As a child my mother grew up in a poor family so she often didn’t have appropriate clothing and outerwear. That is why I think it was not totally intentional on her part. I don’t think she meant to be neglectful but she didn’t care about my feelings either. I forgive her but it still leaves me feeling like a misanthrope towards winter instead of people!

Do you have any suggestions on how to make winter a more positive experience? Remember that I am not very sports oriented but appreciate any ideas you may have on how to enjoy winter more. Thank you.

Β©Natalya, 2013.

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Author: Natalya

Blogging my thoughts and feelings about mostly mental health, meditation and spirituality(non religious). Hoping to connect with other interesting people in the blogosphere. *The name is Russian and is my pseudonym.

31 thoughts on “Holy S*it, It Snowed!

  1. How about building a snowman? πŸ™‚

  2. I was born and raised in Montana, so I know snow and cold. I live in Maine, and live in a cottage at the bottom of a small dirt road known as the luge run πŸ˜‰ On snow days, we bake cookies, and have snowball fights, but mostly, it is a lot of work, especially if no one can get down here, and I cannot coerce my car up and out. I have a big sled so people can meet me up at the main road, and I either load it into their vehicle, or park it there, and drag my laundry, and groceries, and biobricks down. I hate it the most when it is all ice. Before I left my last marriage, we never had heat in the winter, so I know freezing. I am so sorry! My son has, thankfully, forgotten that.

    • Aw, I’m sorry you have to put up with the white stuff too and know what freezing is like 😦 I’m glad you and your son have heat now though!

      Baking cookies and sleigh rides sound nice πŸ˜€ It’s not really practical to go on a sleigh ride where I live in a residential area with cars and traffic in general. Still, I may consider baking some cookies! πŸ˜‰

      Thank you for sharing πŸ˜€

  3. Not growing up with snow makes me like it even more! Lol Truth is I probably would hate it if I had to live with it!! But the photos look so incredible. Hugs from Oz…….Paula x

  4. Stay inside and watch the snow coming down. If you have a fireplace or woodstove stoke it up. make some hot chocolate and snuggle with someone or your dog if you have one and put on some fine music. light some candles and just breathe in the air and maybe tell stories as you sip your hot chocolate. enjoy most of all. just don’t go outside and freeze. jk

  5. Oh, I grew up in a very hot place, so I really like the snow, actually. Especially now that I get the pricklies if it’s even over 73! I’m a nester, so I just stay in and have tea and put a log on the fire. I you don’t have a real fireplace, I suggest getting a cute little electric one and some cocoa, and read a nice book next to it. Works wonders. πŸ™‚

  6. Snow hearts for early Valentine’s day, I’m sure it will replace the bad memories! Have a lovely week!

  7. I think staying as warm and as comfortable as possible, inside, is a good way of getting through the winter. I make lots of hot chocolate. That soothes us. Also doing some exercise inside helps to make you feel warmer. I don’t do a lot of outside winter sports/activities, but when I am out I bundle up good to stay as warm as possible.

    Good and healing thoughts to you.

    Kate

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