Reflections on Life Thus Far

My life. My story: Exploring mental health, spirituality, meditation & random thoughts I have


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Happy New Year (2017)!

It’s a new year so I just thought I’d say “Happy New Year!”. My New Year’s eve and day 8f7583da32895b7d2f518cc75398b72cwere totally uneventful. I stayed in and simply cleared out clutter and cleaned. No parties for me. Not my style. At least I finally got around to some of the clutter I had around that needed tossing (I donate it because although it is clutter to me it is still good stuff and usable). Some might try to make a dollar or two clearing their clutter and I see value in that but I appreciate the immediate gratification of moving the items directly after finishing. It satisfies me more to know I have both accomplished something and done a small bit of good in donating my things I no longer enjoy but someone else may.

This year I have decided to try my best to be totally honest with the people I meet. Thatmask-1503440 doesn’t mean I vomit my secrets on everyone I see but I want to avoid trying to be anyone besides who I really am. Online here is the only exception. But the exception is only with respect to my name, everything else is true. In my ‘real life’ I wish to be open with people in an authentic manner and be just myself. For too long I have tried to be what others (family, people I know, the larger culture around me, etc.) have wanted but it didn’t make me happy. So I decided to make an effort to change that. If people don’t like me then it’s not the end of the world. But it is better than pretending to be someone I am not and feeling like my true self is unworthy. The important thing is I like who I am. That hasn’t always been easy so it’s a big step for me to attempt showing my true self. It means I have to really accept myself completely or else I will always be tempted to present the side of me I think others want/expect.

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As far as I’m concerned one need not be unkind when honest so I will do my best to honour that knowledge. Although it may be hard to hear the truth, as long as it is delivered with the intent to be kind or authentic then I believe it’s okay. Simply giving one’s opinion is not truth though so it’s important to remind one’s self of that if it seems like the same thing (one’s opinion ≠ truth). Some family members of mine, I believe, would probably state their opinions like the truth and think of them as fact; still, that doesn’t make them that.

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Well, that’s more than I’ve written in awhile so I feel pleased with myself.

©Natalya Lyubov, 2017.

 


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Writing As Catharsis

St. Augustine writing, revising, and re-writin...

St. Augustine writing, revising, and re-writing: Sandro Botticelli’s St. Augustine in His Cell (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Everyone likely has different reasons for writing and keeping a blog but the reason I like to blog my thoughts has to do with catharsis. Sometimes it’s to share information but a lot of the time it helps me therapeutically to get my feelings and thoughts out of my head. Of course I could do this in a traditional hard copy journal but it has more significance symbolically when it’s “published” on WordPress for others to read. Maybe there’s a little narcissism involved too. I’m sure there’s a thrill experienced when I see people have read what I’ve written, but beyond that it allows me to reach out to others. In return, fellow bloggers publish their thoughts and feelings and I see I am not the only person to have particular things going through my head.

Since beginning this blog over two months ago I’ve ‘met’ a lot of interesting people willing to share their experiences, either through poetry or writing stories and/or journal style entries. Now I am aware most of us use pseudonyms on here, apart from a few, but I have never felt the experience of reading somebody’s blog diminished because of it. The fact we don’t usually know each other allows for more honesty and greater openness than if we had to use our real names. I like being able to write without worrying too much someone will ‘find’ my blog and know who I am. They will know who I am reading my blog more than if they met me in person and asked me to share stories of my life with them. Blogging like this is more authentic even if I don’t use my real name. Maybe sometime in the future I’ll change my mind and use my real name but for now I don’t want to be constrained/restricted by ‘appearances’.

What about you? Why do you blog? What are your reasons for using a pseudonym or using your ‘real’ name? Do you think that bloggers using their real name are more ‘believable’ than those of us writing under a ‘fake’ name?

© Zen Lady Meditating and Reflections On Life Thus Far, 2012. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Zen Lady Meditating and Reflections On Life Thus Far with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.